a few of you who’ve talked to either me or kim in the last few months may have noticed that we’ve been using ‘2010’ as an adjective.  example sentences include: ‘that’s so not 2010.’  ‘what a 2010 thing to do!’ or ‘this could be a little more 2010.’  this originally started in 2009, when both of us were going through a lot of issues; some about relationships, some just about life things.  it also wasn’t just us; it seemed like a lot of our close friends were also dealing with problems as well, and- borrowing an image from katherine- if you imagine a network of friends as an actual net or a web, the weight of one person’s issues tend to pull on everyone else just a little, and our group was just super sadface all over.   it seemed like a lot of 2009 was spent being sad or disgruntled, or generally unsettled with where we were in life.   we then lumped all of this unpleasantness under the phenomenon of being part of 2009- and, in the spirit of glass half full, we decided 2010 was going to be our year and it was going to be amazing.   it was a way to have a goal to be happier and to have something to look forward too, even if it was just an imaginary phenomenon of our own creation.  so we started with enthusiastic cheers of ‘yay 2010!  this is our year!’ which then evolved into situations being 2010 or not, people’s actions being 2010 or not, and finally the number ‘2010’ become not only an adjective but also an umbrella term for how we imagine we’d like to approach things in life.

it’s currently almost halfway through 2010, and while some things have gotten better, a lot of us are still in a bit of a slump… in fact we pushed back the start of 2010 to chinese new year to give it some more time to work its magic.  clearly it’s still working on it.   but for me anyway, because im sure kim has her own view of 2010 even though it was a joint creation, the idea of 2010 has stuck around as character-shaping sort of attitude, and so i will now explain the tenets of 2010.

the spirit of 2010 revolves greatly around the idea of not hole-digging.

hole-digging: a kim and janice metaphor that started in the big house.  is used to refer to situations when someone is hiding from something they ought to face, or is letting something slide that ought to be addressed, or in other ways not being true to their values or character because it’s easier not to be.  it’s when someone is not being straight forward and is being wishy washy for the purpose of procrastinating something they know they ought to do, or when someone ignores an issue because it’s hard to muster up the emotional energy to tackle that problem.   it’s something everyone does, because lots of time’s it’s easier not to rock the boat in an effort to preserve peace, however superficial.  but then you get to deal with discontentment and resentment and other ‘entments which leads to, at best, a bit of emotion squashing on your part, or at worst gigantic molten lava crazy explosion of misunderstanding and miscommunication.  this = hole digging.

so, 2010 is greatly based on the idea that hole-digging is not ok.  not that this is a new idea at all (though i wonder if anyone else calls it hole-digging), but for us its just a heightened awareness that this is something we do, and we ought to try to avoid it as much as possible.  good first start.  but 2010 also involves the sense of responsibility for our actions that may affect others, and being aware of our effect on other people’s emotions.  it’s the kind of thing that’s easy to ignore because we can always find safety in the idea that we aren’t mind readers, and can’t be sure of how someone might be responding to us.  the thing is, most of the time we do know but it’s easier to assume ignorance until something definitive and unavoidable happens, forcing us to deal with it.    being super open-minded is also part of 2010, in the way that we ought to evaluate why it is we think someone’s out of line, and should try to explore all the reasons why they might be in the right before calling shenanigans.  of course, sometimes people are wrong, or they massively hole-dig, and that’s why we have friends to set us straight when we’ve botched things up.   but benefit of the doubt is key.  and coming clean if you realize that your previous assumptions were wrong, or working through the differences until you’ve both come to a baseline level of understanding is also key.

anyway i’m feeling a bit preachy at this point and so will stop soon.  basically 2010 is me finding that balance between being straightforward and true to myself  and my values and opinions while also being accepting and understanding of other people’s perspective, in a trying on the shoe rather than just acknowledging the difference in shoe style and size sort of way.  again- not new ideas at all, but giving this overall attitude a title is a way to make me more aware of these issues and to be more proactive in pursuing a 2010 approach to life.

yay 2010, year of awesome!

…am going to need a new slogan once 2011 rolls around, though.

Advertisements