Bike story 1:  Freshman year of undergrad.  Location: Oval walkway.  The fences were still up along all the pathways because they were regrowing the grass or something.  Me and tam and brad and dan and jeff and alan and however many of us there were were walking in a row, so we were basically blocking off most of the walkway.   I was probably walking and daydreaming or humming or something (souuunds about right…), but I hadn’t noticed that the rest of the crew had suddenly moved out of my line of vision.  Suddenly I hear a SCReeeeCH CRASHTUMBLETHUD.  I turned around, and there on the ground was some poor biker man who apparently had called out to our group so we’d have time to move away so he could ride past us.   Everyone else had moved, but I, of course, didn’t hear him because of poor bum ear, so in order to avoid hitting me he veered off right into one of the fences and ended up in a human/bike pile on the ground.   Thanks Mr. Biker Man!   O.O  My bad.

Bike story 2:  Second year of med school.  Location: 10th Avenue.  I was riding my bike to school on the sidewalk (this was before I was adventurous enough to ride on the road itself… whoa man!!)  and I stopped an intersection to check for cars.  Because that’s the safe thing to do.  Look left, look right, look let again!  So, this car drove up (good thing I looked left again!)  and I was waiting for him to wait for the cars on the main road to go so he could make his left turn.  The other cars had gone, and he had started moving his car forwards, so I started riding forwards as well, thinking I’d time it so I’d be crossing the street right after he turned, since there was a car coming up behind him and I didn’t want to wait too long.  It was a brilliant plan, except that he deviated from brilliant plan, and stopped again to double check the road, and stopped so abruptly that I didn’t have time to hit my brakes, causing me to ride right into his wheel.  It would’ve been alright if I could say something like, “yeah, and my bike was going so fast that I totally busted his car, yeah beastly biking!”  Much better than, “so I ran into his wheel, and then I proceeded to bounce off said wheel, and immediately fell off my bike afterwards.”  Which, btw, happened just in time for man pulling up behind car to see the whole thing.

Bike story 3:  Third year of med school.  Location: right outside of Meiling Hall.  This one is short, but involved my first attempt to bike while talking on the phone.  Now, you may think that because I can unicycle, a skill that involves no hands and one wheel, one hand with two wheels should be no problem.   That’s what I thought too, until I realized that I lean really heavily on my handlebars, which when done one handedly causes bike to veer dangerously in many directions other than forwards.  Like say, towards an old man hobbling slowly towards the hospital.  Or say, into a steeply angled hill.   Because I’m a future healer in training, and also because the hill looked softer than the old man, I aimed for the hill, and sort of rolled up onto it a good three feet or so before falling off my bike.  Btw, hill was a good choice- nice soft landing, not even a bruise!  Moral of the story- don’t talk and bike.  …if you are me.

Bike story 4:  Some time last year.  Location: Hunter Avenue.  Take bike story 1 and recreate scene on small narrow sidewalk near my apartment.  I really hope that wasn’t the same biker man.

Bike story 5:  This would be the part in the movies where they show a series of 5 second clips of the same sadface event over and over in many different scenarios.  The event being me trying to hop a curb by pulling hard on the handlebars of my bike so I wouldn’t have to find a ramp to get onto the sidewalk, but failing with me not only failing to hop curb, but bouncing off the curb as well.

Bike story 6:  Earlier today.  Location: 10th Avenue.  I was biking home from the hospital.  It was skirts and heels day, which surprisingly has not caused biking problems before.   Today however, when I was about 5 blocks away from home, I stepped extra hard onto my pedal with my left foot and somehow jammed the heel into the pedal.  It was stuck, like those biker shoes that are meant to be stuck to the pedal, except it was attached at the heel rather than the toe, making the whole thing rather awkward.  I tried to yank upwards extra hard while peddling to dislodge my shoe, but it didn’t work.  Sooo I just kept on riding, thinking I’d figure it out when I got home, and meanwhile hoping the man on his hardcore Schwinn wearing a helmet and the kind of clothes that wick sweat away from your body wouldn’t notice that the crazy asian girl is riding with her heel stuck to the pedal of her bike.  I’m now about half a block away from home, so I caaarefully plan my dismount with the goal of minimizing head injury/death.   I don’t really remember what I tried to do, but it clearly didn’t work because as soon as my right foot hit the floor with my left foot still stuck on pedal, I immediately toppled over towards my left, and I would’ve landed on the ground if it weren’t for the telephone pole in my way on which I caught myself instead.   So, awkwardly angled but stable for now, I disentangled myself from my bike but still couldn’t detach my foot from the pedal.   I had to remove foot from shoe and pull on shoe really hard with both hands while bracing my foot against my bike before it came unstuck.  Brief moment of fleeting victory!  And then I put my shoe back on.  And did the walk of shame back to my apartment.

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